07/15/2003 - 8:05 AM

As I drifted off to sleep last night (one of those "it's too hot" restless drifts), it dawned on me that I had glossed over the talk that Matt and I had on Sunday night. Not sure why I skipped it, other than possibly running out of time, but I think it's worth mentioning.

Matt was pretty insistent on the walk, and I really didn't mind it at all, even though it was a bit warm outside. We had been bumming around for a good part of the weekend, so some exercise was sounding pretty good at that point. As we got going, I think he sensed that I might think he had an "agenda" planned, and assured me that he didn't. I had so much on my mind at that point that I was pretty oblivious to anyone else's intentions/thoughts/actions, so that wasn't even a concern. As we walked, we talked about Ashton, and how he had to give up a cat of his own a year ago because of his allergies. We also talked a LOT about the relationship, and where it seems to be going.

While we were up in Vail, we watched a couple of episodes of "Gay Marriages" on the Bravo channel, and I really got into it. Two male and two female couples were followed around with cameras as they prepared for weddings/commitment ceremonies, and was completely captivated by it. I've always leaned away from thinking that I would find myself in that position, but I don't think I'm that anti-marriage anymore. Matt has probably helped make that a more realistic possibility in my mind, but I think I was already mellowing toward the notion, simply on the "equality" argument.

We talked about our families, and how they'd probably react. Matt's parents and mine sound pretty similar...they'd probably be there, although not necessarily in support of the concept as much as of the kids. I apologized as we got into the discussion, saying that it had been on my mind all day, and that I didn't mean to imply anything by having the discussion, which he seemed cool with. And how cheesy is this...I know the boy likes slurpees, so we stopped at a 7-11 and got a big one to split. Awwww...

There were actually a couple of revelations, too. Matt confessed to me that at one point, he was pretty sure I was going to break up with him. I admitted to my crisis of faith a couple of months ago, and it seemed to be coordinated at the same time. He's pretty perceptive...I really like that about him. He also admitted to viewing pornography from time to time, which I was pretty sure he was morally against. *phew* So I'm not the only morally deranged person in this relationship!

I feel so comfortable around him. There's a sense of familiarity that I don't know that I've ever felt with someone I've dated this long before. Usually the guys that I have made it past the three-month mark with are the ones that seemed a mystery, but Matt's an open book. Hopefully he feels the same way about me.

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My boss is flying in from Chicago this morning, so the next couple of days here at work will be hectic. Her boss told me yesterday that he's asked her to come in twice a month for at least the next few months to build up a working relationship, and although I see his point, I'm not overly-thrilled with the idea.

(Must keep a positive attitude...must keep a positive attitude...)

What I'm Listening To: Bonnie Raitt - Have a Heart

First Word That Comes To Mind: work

What I'm Currently Reading: