07/14/2003 - 10:43 AM

This weekend was definitely one of those "good news, bad news" times. One of those times where you're conflicted in feeling good about things in your life as other things go wrong. The best thing to do is take the changes in stride, appreciate all the good in your life, and then continue on, but it's tough not to dwell on the bad side of things.

Ashton has a new home, and I brought him there last night. I remember when I brought Ashton home, it was almost an hour from his old home, and he cried and meowed the entire way. There was no way that I was going to let his new "housemates" have to endure that as their first impression of him, so I insisted on bringing him over myself. In retrospect, I don't know if that was the best thing I could have done for my mental state. As he cried, all I could do was think to myself what a horrible parent I was being, and that I'd let him down. He'd look up at me with those beautiful eyes through the crate, and I'd just feel worse.

Got to Laura's place, and he was still crying, but as soon as the door to the crate opened, he was out of there and under the couch, where he wasn't making a peep. Laura's husband Brad attempted to get him out with treats, but no luck. So I went to bend over and check on him, and he wouldn't look at me, and I lost it. Laura gave me a hug, and asked if I needed a beer or something, and I said I thought it would be better if I just left at that point. It took about 10 minutes to pull myself completely together, but I did it.

Which leads to the good part of the weekend...Matt. Can one man be any sweeter than he is? Possibly, but I haven't seen it.

We were invited up to Vail by a friend of his to spend the night on Saturday, and it was a lot of fun. Matt and his friend BJ rode up in one car, and I rode up with SH, who is a friend of Matt and MU's. SH is a trip...she's a great pool player, and is actually looking to go pro sometime in the near future. For the past six months, she's been dating another pool player, and things have gotten really serious between the two of them. The house actually belongs to SH's boyfriend, but he was in Las Vegas, so she invited the three of us up to keep her company.

I rode up with SH, and we had a really good time. We've never had much one-on-one time, so it was great to get to know her better. In the course of the conversation, she told me how happy she is that Matt and I found each other, and that she thinks we're really good for each other. I'll let you picture how big the smile was on my face.

The house is great...one of those places you see driving down the highway that looks like it's built right into the side of a mountain. Three levels, four bedrooms, and a beautiful view from the deck. We didn't do much in Vail itself, other than go grab dinner and stop at Safeway. Most of the time was spent at the house, watching TV, losing miserably to SH at pool, and playing Uno until 1:45 in the morning. It was such a great time...and Matt and I even got in some great quality time in the jacuzzi tub Saturday night.

We drove back to Denver Sunday afternoon, and it was so damn hot! Fortunately, the nights in Colorado are better than the ones back east, where it really doesn't cool off that much at night. Denver has the most comfortable sleeping weather I've ever experienced, although this is coming from someone who has been referred to as a "human blast furnace". Bounced around a couple of places through the afternoon, and then headed back to my place so I could take care of Ash. Matt looked at me on the way home and said, "I know you'd rather not stay at your place alone tonight. Do you want to stay at my place?" This boy is WAY too good to me! After I got to his place, we watched the tail-end of Sex and the City, and then went for a walk that lasted about an hour. By the time we got back, I was so worn out from the weekend that I read a little bit, and then fell off to sleep, only waking briefly to see Matt get into bed (BJ ended up crashing on the couch, and he was making sure BJ was comfortable). To see that face lean over and kiss me...

Can you tell I'm in love with the boy?

What I'm Listening To: Lil' Kim - Magic Stick

First Word That Comes To Mind: conflicted

What I'm Currently Reading: